You're Only Second Mate
by benderjam
Summary: This is another one-shot fanfiction that is a deleted scene from my Rio During the Ice Age story. Squint tries to show Nigel he's tougher and a better first mate but Nigel sings a song and shows Squint that he's only second mate. If any of you out there read this and my other one The Master of the Seas I suggest you also read Rio During the Ice Age; but these stories are not in it.


You're Only Second Mate

Gutt, Nigel, and the crew were in the smugglers' hideout and they were in the storage room with cages that contained different birds.

Nigel's stomach growled and he was standing on Gutt's left shoulder as he looked at him and said, "I'm getting hungry. Go get me some chicken."

Gutt smiled evilly at Nigel as he said, "Sure thing first mate."

Nigel flew off his shoulder as he, Flynn, Raz, Smit, Silas, and Gupta walked toward the door.

Gutt turned and pointed at Squint standing next to Nigel on the floor and he said, "Squint, you stay here with Nigel."

Squint smiled evilly as he looked at Nigel and said, "With pleasure captain!"

Gutt closed the door behind him as they left; Squint then pointed the sharp tip of his swordfish skull (which had a vine rapped around the middle) at Nigel's neck.

Nigel turned his eyes to Squint with an annoyed expression as Squint angrily said, "Listen birdie, there's only one first mate in this crew and that's me! And I am not going to settle for second mate!"

He then tackled Nigel on the ground and stood on his chest as he pointed his swordfish skull at Nigel's face. Nigel showed an angry and annoyed expression as he looked up at Squint.

Squint smiled evilly and conceitedly as he looked at Nigel as he said, "Now who's first mate?!"

Nigel smiled evilly as he laughed like he was amused; he then put his left foot up and used his talon to move Squint's swordfish skull away from him. Then he got up and knocked Squint off his chest; Squint stood in front of him and showed surprise as Nigel smiled in a gloating manner.

Nigel put his right wing in his chest with the feathers spread out like fingers as he said, "I believe it's me."

Squint showed confusion as music began to play in the background. Nigel began to sing as he crossed his wings over his chest like arms. Nigel then took his right wing of his chest and moved his feathers like fingers as he flicked Squint's nose, which made him fall backwards.

Nigel: "_I have to say_

_Your acts of play_

_Amuse me._"

As Nigel continued to sing he walked to Squint's left side and stood over him as he looked down at his head. Squint looked up at him angrily; as Nigel smiled evilly.

Nigel: "_I'm sure a magician_

_Will pull you out of his hat_"

On the next lines Nigel smiled evilly as he grabbed Squint in his wings with his head above his right wing. Nigel then moved his left wing like an arm and curled the feathers like fingers as he pulled on Squint's ears. Then he moved his wing down holding onto Squint's ears and he moved it up and threw him forward like he was a ball or a piece of garbage.

Nigel: "_I'll give you a chance_

_To try and defeat me_

_Because there's nothing I'm afraid of_

_Come on show me what you're made of_"

Squint landed on his chest and his legs went up over his legs as his head was on the ground. He quickly got up and angrily ran toward Nigel as he sang but Nigel simply smiled gloatingly as he held his wing out with his feathers curled like fingers over Squint's head as he held him back. Squint angrily mumbled and waved his arms and his swordfish skull, but Nigel simply pushed him down with the wing he was holding him back with. Squint angrily got up but Nigel put his head in front of him as he smiled evilly, then he moved his left wing like an arm. He bent his feathers on his left wing like fingers as he grabbed the top whisker on the right side of Squint's face. Two feathers formed a circle like a thumb and index finger pinching something while the other two feathers stuck straight up.

On the last two lines of the verse Nigel smiled evilly as he plucked Squint's whisker as Squint simultaneously said, "Ow!"

Nigel: "_You try to hit me with your best stuff_

_But no matter what it's not enough_

_Try and get this straight_

_You're far too out of date_

_You're only second mate!_"

On the next lines Nigel smiled evilly and conceitedly as he took a few steps back with his arms crossed over his chest, as he slightly leaned to the left of the screen (if this were a movie). Then Squint angrily ran toward him but Nigel did not change his expression; when Squint was close enough Nigel stepped to the right (your right) with his right foot sticking out and he tripped Squint. After Squint quickly got up Nigel smiled evilly and gloatingly as he looked down at Squint and put the feather of his right wing on his chest like an index finger. Nigel then moved his right wing and took Squint's swordfish skull and then pointed it at him like it was a stick a teacher would use to point to something on a chalkboard.

Nigel: "_You think you're a great pirate_

_But the tides have changed_

_You can't beat me because you're too deranged._

_Now that I should con-fi-scate_

_You're only second mate!_"

Nigel then threw the swordfish skull backwards over his head and it got stuck in the wall. Squint looked at it but then turned around as he saw Nigel standing in front of a cage with five small ball-shaped blue birds. He smiled evilly as he put his left foot up with his talons pointing up and the birds backed away in fear as they made gentle sounds of fear. Then he turned back to Squint with an evil and gloating smile as he moved his wing like a hand and looked at the back of it with his feathers pointing out like fingers (like a human looking at their nails).

Nigel: "_Birds fear_

_the shear_

_of my talons._

_My wing_

_Will make them sting_

_And that is fun!_"

Nigel then quickly flew in the air and landed in front of Squint as he looked down at him (because he's bigger). Squint looked up at Nigel angrily. He then put his wings out in front of him like arms and the feathers pointing out. Then he smiled evilly and gloatingly as he crossed his wings over his chest and looked at Squint out of the corners of his eyes.

Nigel: "_But if you still don't think that I'm the better one_

_Try and take me down_

_You're nothing but a silly clown!_"

Squint angrily ran toward him and pounced toward his chest but Nigel did not move an inch. Nigel remained standing with his wings crossed over his chest as Squint continued. Squint then climbed on Nigel's right shoulder and pulled on his wing with his eyes closed as he made sounds of exertion. Nigel's wing did not move at all; Squint then stood in front of him and started punching his stomach but Nigel showed no pain. While Squint did this Nigel sang with a friendly looking and nonchalant smile as his eyes looked away and toward the left corner of the ceiling (imagine him looking up toward the top right corner of the screen). Nigel then moved his left wing and smiled evilly as he grabbed Squint by his ears as he held him in front of his face for a moment. Then he moved his wing up as he threw Squint at an empty cage.

Nigel: "_Go ahead and hit me_

_With your greatest shot_

_I can take a hit_

_Give me all you've got._

_I'll meet you at the gate,_

_You're already too late,_

_You're only second mate!_"

Squint angrily stood up and as Nigel continued to sing he flew on top of the cage Squint just hit and he had his wings out at his sides (like a threatening bird) and he smiled evilly. Squint climbed on top of the cage angrily but once he got on the cage Nigel lifted his right foot and pointed his left toe out like a finger. He moved his talon up at the edge of his cheek and cut off a few small hairs. Then he moved his left wing forward and moved his feathers like fingers and put one on Squint's chest like an index finger. Then he put his left wing over his stomach and moved it out and knocked Squint off the cage and onto the floor, as if he back slapped him.

On the final line of the verse Squint angrily sat up with his hands on the floor as he simultaneously said, "Grrr!"

Nigel: "_You know your speed and reflexes_

_Aren't acceptable,_

_And your brains and brawns_

_Aren't respectable._

_So let me reiterate_

_About your lousy rate_

_You're only second mate!_"

During a short instrumental break Squint jumped on his feet with his fists up and Nigel hovered for a moment and then landed in front of him as he leaned down with an evil and gloating smile, while he continued singing. Then on the final line of the short verse Nigel hovered a few feet above Squint and smiled at him evilly.

Nigel: "_Are you even trying?!_

_Why don't we go flying?!_"

During another short instrumental break Squint showed a scared expression as he saw where Nigel was going. He then started to run but as Nigel sang he flew over him and then grabbed him and then quickly flew out the window and hundreds of feet in the air.

Nigel: "_Such a foolish effort_

_That you tried to assert_"

As Nigel continued to sing he stopped flying and let go of Squint as he was in the air to the right (your right of him). They stopped moving for a moment and Nigel smiled in a friendly manner as he put his wings in front of him with his feathers touching each other like fingers. Then they both began to fall as Nigel put his left wing on his waist with his feathers curled up like a fist. He also had his right wing up with his feathers curled as he pointed at Squint (imagine two feathers curled and one pointing at Squint like an index finger and one sticking out to the side like a thumb). Squint looked down and screamed as he tried to grab Nigel and then tried to flap his arms like wings.

Nigel now had his back facing the ground as they fell, he had his wings behind his head like arms and his left leg was bent sideways over his right one, like he was lying on a couch. He smiled evilly as he looked at Squint out of the top corners of his eyes. Then he turned to where his stomach was facing the ground and his wings were crossed in front of his chest, like he was lying on a couch with his head up and his arms crossed. He was still in the same position on the fifth and sixth lines of the verse as he moved his right wing out and moved his feathers like fingers and poked the side of Squint's head. While he did this Squint had his chest facing the ground with his chin up and his arms and legs spread out as his fur blew in the air. On the seventh and eighth lines of the verse Squint was getting closer to the ground and he saw he would land in an alley way as his face started to face the ground and he moved lower than Nigel as smiled evilly and gloatingly as he looked down at Squint with his wing under his right cheek and his feathers curled like fingers. Then on the final line of the verse (and song) he moved his wing to side of his head with his feathers sticking out in different directions like fingers (like a man sticking their open palm up and their fingers pointing in different directions to refer to something).

Nigel: "_So let's forget that this happened_

_You'd look so much better if you were flattened_

_I knew that it was me you hate_

_When we had to congregate_

_I suppose it was simply_

_Just cruel fate_

_You'd be better off_

_Learning to figure skate_

_You're only second mate!_"

As the music ended Squint closed his eyes as he was about to land on the ground face first. Fortunately he stopped falling just before his face could hit the ground; he dropped his arms as he sighed in relief.

Nigel was holding him by his feet as he hovered and stared into space with a nonchalant expression as he said, "Alright I think you get my point."

He dropped Squint and Squint landed on his chin and his body fell down.

Nigel landed in front of and smiled evilly as he leaned over him while saying, "Now then, would you like to say anything else?"

Squint's body shook on the ground as he looked up at Nigel with fear and he shook his head back and forth quickly.

Nigel smiled in a pleased manner as he said, "Good, see how much better it is when you don't question me?"

He turned around and began to fly away as he said, "Now come on let's get back to the hideout."

As he flew Squint pulled himself up and groaned angrily as he said to himself, "Stupid bird!"

He jumped in fear as he heard Nigel's voice say, "What was that?!"

Squint looked up at Nigel (Nigel was not on the screen, just imagine him looking up into space) and smiled nervously and innocently as he put his arms behind his back and said, "Nothing!"

He heard Nigel speak with a pleased tone as he said, "That's what I thought."

**Author's note: When Nigel sings try to imagine the music from You're only second rate from Aladdin: The Return of Jafar. If you haven't heard it look it up on youtube. I'm hoping this will inspire someone with a youtube account to post a video like this between Nigel and someone else. Just like The Master of the Seas.**


End file.
